My Mother's Passing
What Happens When We Die
December 27, 2016
It is one year ago today that my mother passed away. Living 4,500 miles away, I was lucky to have visited her three months earlier, in September. I hadn't seen her in four years at that point, and frankly, I was afraid she wouldn't be around by the time I could afford a trip home. She was her usual witty self. At 93, her body showed the signs of wear, but her mind was still strong – most of the time. As I said goodbye on my last visit before returning to Seattle she hugged me and said with sadness, “I will never see you again Michael!” We both knew it could be true, but I didn’t expect either of us to say it. I put on a brave face, but was choking up. The water works started as soon as I sat in my car.
In mid-December, I got a call from sister to say mom suffered a minor stroke and was recovering. A few days later my brother phoned to say she hadn't woken up since the stroke and the doctors were now saying she wouldn’t make it. The doctors removed the drip she was on. They expected her to last 48 hours. It was removed on Friday the 18th and my ticket was for Monday 21st. My partner, Sandy, said not to worry because she wouldn't pass until after Christmas. Not receiving food or water, that seemed impossible. I kept consoling myself with the fact that I had seen her earlier in the year. The closer my plane got to Ireland the more panicked I was that she’d pass before I got to see her. I rushed directly from the airport to the hospital.
It was the middle of the night and to my great relief, mom was still with us. I sat with three of my sisters for hours in the darkened room. They had a well-established routine for tending to her. Her hands were warm and her body was calm, but there were no visible signs of awareness.
Once I relaxed, I tuned into her and could feel her chakras. I learned the technique to do that almost by accident. Simply ground yourself and remove influencing thoughts. Then focus on the person you want to connect with. The more still you become, the more you can sense. I believe it is similar to how striking a tuning fork will cause other turning forks, that are tuned to the same frequency, to vibrate in harmony with it. Your energy body becomes like a tuning fork and begins to vibrate in harmony with your target.
I could immediately tell that only her top 3 chakras were active. My guides told me that meant she was only partially in her body and because she was only partially in, she wasn’t in any pain. That was a huge relief. However, they told me that she was very aware of everything that was going on around her. I was glad for that too. Periodically I sensed her moving further into her body but she never quite got back in as far as her heart chakra. She would try but then retreat again.
I could sense her sister, who had recently passed, was playing imaginative games with her and lifting her spirit. I could see them both as young girls, climbing trees. Young girls – but at the same time, very aware of their present circumstances. I think her sister was enticing her to leave but she wasn’t ready yet. My own sisters suspected I was tuning in and pushed me for details. I was initially reluctant to share but when I saw their relief, my reluctance diminished. Not everyone in my family shares my appetite for spiritual things.
Other family members arrived and took over the vigil. I retreated to bed. Once rested I returned to the vigil. There were lots of my family at her bedside now as it was daytime and hospital policy allowed for more to be present. Due to the large group, I ended up standing by her head. When I tuned into her, I could clearly tell she was tuned into me! Her brow chakra was buzzing with the connection. She could read my thoughts effortlessly. I told her how much I loved her and thanked her for waiting for me. Mentally, I talked about everything and anything. I talked about guides and my philosophy. I suspected she was tapped in now and her knowledge and experience far surpassed mine. Still it comforted me to talk about it. She could only read the thoughts of the person she focused on, and they had to be directly in front of her. She couldn’t move her head so was limited to that scope. I only told a few of my siblings about this.
I wondered how she had the ability as she didn’t have it before. I wondered if our spiritual abilities awaken as we get closer to the threshold. My guides later told me that her guides activated the ability in a very controlled manner depending on who was around her. Yes, it is obvious to me now too!
Over the next 4 days I joined the vigil as often as I could. Depending on who was with me, I kept quiet about what I witnessed. Sometimes mom would make it back in as far as her heart chakra and her chest would heave with her breath. She couldn’t hold it for long before retreating.
During a night vigil, I noticed her rosary beads were in a different position in her hands. She was devoutly religious and the family had intertwined the beads in her hands as if she was saying the rosary. I watched her hands intently. Nothing happened for a long time, then very, very slowly, she moved the beads. I wanted evidence for my sisters, so recorded her hands with my camera. When played back at a faster speed, you could clearly see that she was saying the rosary in her mind and moving the beads in time. I said her familiar prayers in my own mind and on cue, at all the right points, she moved the beads. That was physical evidence of awareness. I played the videos to my sisters and they were stunned too. From that point on, out of respect, they tried to police the conversation people engaged in at her bedside. It was safe to assume now that she was cognizant of what was being said.
The day before she passed, I arrived at the hospital to see her propped up with eyes open. She had full control over where her eyes focused on but limited control of her head movements. She still couldn’t talk. When I tuned in, she was fully in her body. All her chakras were active and she still had no pain.
I had gotten married since September so thumbed through photos of my wedding with her. Her eyes followed where I pointed and she listened intently – clearly absorbing it all. She managed to say half a word at times but the effort was too great.
On December 27th, I had already visited her but got a call to come back quickly as she was expected to pass. When I got to the hospital, everyone was there. She was lying in the bed with eyes closed. Her breathing was the only sign of life. On tuning in, I could still sense all chakras were active. She was still with us. At around 6:30pm I was standing beside my brother at the end of her bed. He whispered that something was happening. I felt her crown chakra buzz. It was incredibly strong. After about 45 seconds her brow chakra buzzed too. Forty seconds later, it returned to normal followed by her throat chakra buzzing. Forty seconds later it moved to her heart chakra. And so on, down through her solar plexus, sacral and base chakras. Then it started moving upwards with the same timing interval. When it reached her brow chakra it reversed direction again and moved down her body to her base chakra again. It reversed again and moved upwards. Each chakra change was like a punch. Very sure and precise. I noticed that this was having an effect on my brother and could see his chakras were somehow horizontally connected with my mothers. As a chakra would buzz, a lot of energy was transferred to his corresponding chakra. Although lots of us were around, the energy transfer only connected with him. This was the last pass. When the buzzing reached her brow chakra it stayed for the same amount of time and then faded. Her crown chakra remained wide open but there were no other energy movements. My brother turned to me and whispered, “She’s gone.” He looked like he had been beaten up! He left to get fresh air.
I didn’t believe she was gone because she was still breathing and I could still feel her crown chakra was active. A short while later I joined my brother in the lobby. He looked a little better but was still insistent that she had left. We didn’t share our experiences with anyone else. I remained puzzled.
When night arrived, the nurses changed shift. The new head nurse would not allow all of us to remain at her bedside. Only 3 were allowed. We established a rotation. I stayed tuned into her crown chakra while part of the group in the waiting room. During the second rotation, we were all called to her bedside. She had stopped breathing. But I could still see and feel that her crown chakra was very much active. That made no sense to me. It slowly dawned on me that my brother was right. She had left her body immediately after the whirlwind sequence played on her chakras. Once her spirit was gone, her body remained breathing on automatic pilot for a while. I tried to tune into her aura to see it, but there were so many spirits in the room surrounding her that I couldn’t see past them!
The following day, in the hospital chapel, her crown chakra was just as active. There were fewer spirits, so I was able to see that she had no aura. On the day of her funeral, just before the casket was sealed, her crown chakra was still just as active. This is something I didn't understand until one year later. I was explaining what I witnessed to my daughter, Heidi. She channeled that chakras are part of the body and not part of the soul! That has to be true!
Anyway, I promised I would finally write my account on her anniversary. I tried before, but never got through it! Today, I knew it would feel right. Goodbye mom. Thanks for everything.